i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
