...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
