Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
