remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
