I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
