I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
