I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize