so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I want to be your penis for a week.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
