so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
i now understand why vodka
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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