so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize