Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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