My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
