I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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