Rock
Scissors
Fuck
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
