Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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