Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
