One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
