Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
