Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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