Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Randomize
