He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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