so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
