Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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