I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
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