just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
When did angry sex become our thing?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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