That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
There r osticjed everywhere
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
