I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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