Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
