I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
