We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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