just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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