just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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