thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize