We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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