i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I am naked and annoyed.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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