We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
