so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
