I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
