Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize