Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
