maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
