she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He? As in you personified your dick?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
