what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
