In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize