brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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