Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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