woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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