He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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