whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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