I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
