how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
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