As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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