I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
